ugh

I feel like shit right now. My stomach is killing me. I've felt weird since friday now. I don't know if it's purely physical, if it's stress related, what it is. regardless, I feel like shit. I'm having trouble sleeping. I'm a wreck right now.

This is not where I saw myself on the verge of my 30th birthday. I'm contemplating quitting my job for the second time in a year. That doesn't sit well with me. I'm a very loyal person by nature. If you treat me with respect, I'll carry you on my back, no questions asked. But I'm feeling no respect from my superiors at the current job. I don't want to stay there, but I don't want to quit again. At least this time I'm in a better position. Last year, I didn't have a job for 3 months and was desparate to get back to work and feel worthwhile again. Now I've got a job, and can be pickier about what I do and where I go, depending on the opportunities that are out there.

So, for those of you complaining about me not blogging, this is why. I'm dead tired. I have no motivation to do anything. and I feel sick all the time. So sitting down to type this stuff is not at the tops of my list of things to accomplish when I get home at night. I come home, sit down, and really do nothing for a few hours, then try to fall asleep for a few hours.

anyways, I'm going to lay down now. I might just call in sick tomorrow, try to get some r&r.