An update in four parts.

Family Update - so, let's see. mom went into the psych ward, but is home now and with medication (hopefully) straightned out. I'm still having headaches/pain in my head. going back to the doctor in a week or so if I still have them. I went last week, and he diagnosed them as tension for the time being, which made sense considering what all was going on in my life.

Hobby Update - I've started the Fall Hiking Spree with the 2 other Doors, G-doors mom, and G-door's sister. There's 13 trails in the Summit MetroParks to do and have a parks representative initial a form stating you did it. If you complete 8 of the 13 trails by the end of november you receive a badge and in our cases a hiking staff for being first year hikers. We completed two of the trails last weekend. G-door's mom has the whole thing scheduled out for us which trails we're doing which weekends. Our plan is to do all 13 trails.

I've put more pictures up on my Photo Blog as well.

Work update - I've officially applied for the second Software Architect position. My interview is Tuesday. I still don't know if I'm quite cut out for it, but I'm definately willing to give it a shot. I'm excited about the possibility. I think it'd be a good chance for me to do something other than just coding, and actually take a break from coding for once. It'd also give me some mobility when it comes to the next job. I'll be able to take the skills I learn from Zak as an SA and apply them most anywhere. So, I'm gonna study up on some UML and other things over the weekend, and just go in on Tuesday and tell it like it is. Worst case I keep doing what I'm doing now (ugh).

Dating update - dating scene has dried up. Which surprisingly is bugging me more than normal. This is the first real "drought" since I got back into the dating scene this year. Went years upon years without a date, but not having someone to be working on a relationship with is leaving a bigger hole than I expected it to. Match seems to have dried up for me, same with yahoo. So, we'll see what happens. Hopefully I can find someone to try again with soon.

I'm feeling better and I'm feeling worse

I went to bed last night at about 10:30 pm. I fell asleep around 3:30 am. I thikn I didn't eat enough yesterday, and must've had low blood sugar or something. I woke up this morning, decided not to go to work, and instead went to urgent care. They put me on a saline IV which helped my light-headed, weak feelings. They did blood work and saw I was low on potassium. I came home, got into bed, and was planning on sleeping/resting the rest of the day. Instead I spent the evening back at urgent care. This time with my mom. She was having another anxiety attack and was out of her "nerve pills". Don't ask me to go into details, because I'm not going to. I'm finally sitting down now at 8:30. I hope this is a quiet weekend and that I can sleep. I need to.

two, two, two posts in one night!

Just had a chat with the latest woman I've been seeing. She and I both decided it was best that we stopped seeing each other. Neither of use felt that "it" factor. I'm not upset, really. If I look back at what I've done this year on the dating scene (6 dates with 4 different women) compared to the rest of my dating history (3 dates, 3 different women) I'm proud of myself. I'm trying to get out there and find the woman that I'm looking for. So far I just haven't met her yet. I've met some great women that hopefully I'll keep in touch with as friends. And there will be more dates. I'm kinda starting to get the hang of it. Still no dating expert, that's for sure. But I'm also not freaking out when I go on them either.

My Passion

A friend once told me "Chris, you need to find your passion in life". The same friend said "Come on, let me touch your deformed ear. I just want to touch it!" so you have to take their advice with a grain of salt.

What (if any) are my passions in life?
Computers? - well,I spend the majority of my life in front of one, but I'm not really passionate about them. It's my job. I seem to be fairly good at it. I enjoy using it for recreation and
information purposes. But I don't know if I'd call it a passion

Reading? - Used to be my passion, but I can't focus on reading like I used to.

Music? - Out of everything, I'd say this was my last great passion in life. Back when I was in the marching band (shut up! marching band can be passionate, damn you!) I definatly felt like I had a purpose. I enjoy listening to music now, but I get so focused on the music, that I can't do much else at the same time while listening to it. I should get back to the piano sometime. I tried the guitar, maybe I could try it again. I don't see myself playing the trumpet again though. That was a different time, and I don't think my blood pressure could handle it now.

Games? - This would be my biggest hobby. Collecting and playing video/computer/board/card games. Could I call it a passion? maybe, maybe not

Photography/Outdoors? - Two of my more recent hobbies I've picked up. I've tried to get into them, but have lost interest lately. Probably due to how shitty a summer this has been.

It's just so hard to get myself to do anything. I come home from work and just don't want to think, don't want to move, don't want to do a god damn thing at all. Gotta find a way to change that.

ugh

I feel like shit right now. My stomach is killing me. I've felt weird since friday now. I don't know if it's purely physical, if it's stress related, what it is. regardless, I feel like shit. I'm having trouble sleeping. I'm a wreck right now.

This is not where I saw myself on the verge of my 30th birthday. I'm contemplating quitting my job for the second time in a year. That doesn't sit well with me. I'm a very loyal person by nature. If you treat me with respect, I'll carry you on my back, no questions asked. But I'm feeling no respect from my superiors at the current job. I don't want to stay there, but I don't want to quit again. At least this time I'm in a better position. Last year, I didn't have a job for 3 months and was desparate to get back to work and feel worthwhile again. Now I've got a job, and can be pickier about what I do and where I go, depending on the opportunities that are out there.

So, for those of you complaining about me not blogging, this is why. I'm dead tired. I have no motivation to do anything. and I feel sick all the time. So sitting down to type this stuff is not at the tops of my list of things to accomplish when I get home at night. I come home, sit down, and really do nothing for a few hours, then try to fall asleep for a few hours.

anyways, I'm going to lay down now. I might just call in sick tomorrow, try to get some r&r.

I'm back

Been a while, but I'm back. My sister and her family have moved into a twinplex on the other side of town. This is good for everybody. They can finally get back to some sense of normalcy rather than being "homeless" for the past 3 weeks. And we here can get back to normalcy as well, mom and dad can calm down, mom can get back to therapy for her leg, and I can get a chance to relax.

Things at work have been horrible the past week or two. Honestly, I don't know what I'm going to do. I've felt the urge to just stand up, and walk right out the door a few times. Hopefully now that the home life is settled down, I can get some chance to unwind and I won't be quite so tense/jumpy/aggrivated/on edge like I've been for the past couple weeks.

Anyways, I'm back, hopefully I'll have some interesting things to blog about. but I wouldn't hold your breath waiting

life

Sometimes life just throws you a curveball and beans you upside the head. My sister and her family (husband, and 3 kids) were up on a cabin on a lake in Canada. No electricity, no phone, no contact to the outside world basically. I was sitting in the living room, surfing iTunes for comedians, dad was watching the news, and mom was fiddling with something. I looked up to see a fire truck come from brimfield headed towards rootstown. This isn't a normal occurance, that meant there was a fire somewhere that required assistance from outside townships. 5 minutes later we received a phone call letting us know that my sister's house was on fire. We quickly piled into the car and drove the mile and a half down the street to arrive on the scene to find 4 firetrucks already there. Eventually we found out that the fire started in the basement, the firefighters were able to stop the fire from spreading beyond there, but the entire house was filled with smoke and soot damage. They're staying with us for the time being while they go through the inventory process and determine how to rebuild their house and find a temporary place to stay for the next 4-6 months. So that's been my life for the past week.

Been a while

So, yeah. It's been a while since I posted. almost a week. Not like there hasn't been anything to talk about, just haven't had felt like it. So let's see, how's about a quick round-up

1. Tammy and I are going to stay friends, due to some unforeseen and unfortunate circumstances
2. Craig's officially gone as of last friday
3. All three of my big projects coincidentally went apeshit at the same time
4. I had my first full beer (and probably my last)
5. I saw Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
6. I've hit a new low (or more appropriately a new high) in the weight department

So, all of this happened in the span of a week. was a busy week. I don't thikn I'll have a beer again anytime soon. Like the documentation for my meds said, it really does counteract it's effects. I ended up very depressed friday night into saturday until I could get another pill into the system. So, yeah, I don't see myself drinking again anytime soon.

I'm not really looking forward to going back to work tomorrow. It's been a while since I was actually interested in going in, but tomorrow is just not going to be fun. First day post-slush and I get to hear what Corwin's "issues" with ASAP are. Can't be anything good.

Anyways, I recommend people see Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I found it to be hilarious and heart-warming. The kid who played Charlie was amazing. Like I said, I recommend it unless you're one of those stupid people who are getting hung up on the fact that it's too different from your treasured original movie from the 70s. In this day and age, re-makes are inevitable. It's a part of life. You can either accept it, and see the movie as it stands on it's own. Or if you really are against re-makes, then just don't go see it. Don't bitch about it. Bitching about it does nothing. Speak with your wallet, not with your mouth.

If I sound bitter, I guess I am a little bit. Why? I don't know. Do you care? doubt it. Do I care if you care? Yeah, not likely. I'm going to try to get back on my diet again. gonna start the stepper and weights in the morning before work. gotta do something to bring the weight down.

Anyways, that's pretty much everything. Until next time. l8r

ahhhh

full gut from ching chang chong, tunes blasting, SBC in z's durango, just watching the world go by before we go back to hell

this weekend

wow. this weekend started off well with the hike. got some more blisters, gotta get some regular walking shoes in place of my hiking boots. Then things got weird saturday night. It looks like Tammy and I are going to just be friends, due to some circumstances. After talking with her for a while, I had trouble getting to sleep. Got up, made it in for rollout, which SUCKED. Seriously, why would we try to fuck with the load balancing on the XML servers on a rollout day. That networking bullshit needs to be on it's own day so it doesn't interfere and extend the regular rollout stuff. As always, networking did nothing wrong and it was all programmer's fault. Until it was proven that yes, networking screwed something up and it wasn't our fault. 'Bout an hour later I was finally able to test my ONE TASK for rollout. Ended up being the last one to leave. Stopped by Best Buy on the way home. Picked up the Transporter (saw the preview for Transporter 2 at Fantastic Four last night, looked really good), the Daily Show dvds (can't beat anything with Jon Stewart) and a new FM transmitter for my mp3 player. Came home and did laundry and watched The Transporter. Very good action/popcorn flick. Now I'm sitting here watching Family Guy (one of the BEST SHOW'S EVAR!!!) Doesn't feel like the weekend should be over. God I need a vacation soon, or I'm gonna really burn out.

saturday

just finished a 4 mile hike on the towpath. now me and the door's are at winking lizard in macedonia waiting for some food.

Friday morning

TGIF. no, seriously, *TG* it's friday. Rollout weekend unfortunately, so I'll be losing part of my weekend. but as long as I get to sleep in a little bit tomorrow morning, I'll be ok. Found an RSS reader for the Treo. looks pretty interesting so far. Finished Beyond Good & Evil last night,
good game, not horrendously deep, but fun nonetheless. I started Atelier Iris last night, I'm liking the alchemy idea, finding elements in objects all over the place. Should be a fun game. Anywho, gotta go get ready for work. *T* *G* *I* *F*!

7000 song shuffle

I have approximately 7,000 songs on my mp3 player. Somedays I'll just select every song I have in, set it to shuffle, and see what pops up. Sometimes I find some good stuff I haven't heard for a while, other times I'll find things that I scratch my head and wonder why it's in there. From time to time, I'll keep track of what I listen to and post it here as a curiosity. Here's today's list...


audio\Pop\Ben Folds Five\Naked Baby Photos\14-Philosophy (live at De Melkweg, Amsterdam 3-18-97).mp3
audio\Pop\t.A.T.u\200 KMpH In The Wrong Lane\03-Show Me Love.mp3 audio\Classical\Bourne.Identity.1CD.2002.Soundtrack.[WmC]\14 - Jason Phones It In.mp3
audio\Classical\J. S. Bach - Guitar Transcriptions\01-Partita in A minor-Allemande (4m21s).ogg
audio\Hard Rock\Kid Rock\Devil Without A Cause\05-Roving Gangster (Rollin').mp3
audio\Hard Rock\Marilyn Manson\Lest We Forget (The Best Of)\11-Tourniquet.mp3
audio\Hard Rock\Godsmack\Faceless\03-Changes.mp3
audio\Pop\Spice Girls\(Spice Girls) Too Much.mp3
audio\Rap-Hip-Hop\Eminem\The Marshall Mathers LP\12-Ken Kaniff (Skit).mp3
audio\Other\billbrown\AGS_Spiritual.mp3
audio\Other Rock\U2\All That You Can't Leave Behind\05-Kite.mp3
audio\Hard Rock\Sum 41\Chuck\12 - There's No Solution.mp3
audio\Other\FF8\16 Waltz For The Moon.mp3
audio\Soundtracks\Junya Nakano, Massashi Hamauzu & Nobuo U\FINAL FANTASY X (Original Soundtrack)\3-21 Suteki Da Ne (Isn't It Wonderfu.mp3
audio\Classical\Charlotte Church\Voice Of An Angel\07-Psalm 23.mp3
audio\Other Rock\Tori Amos\Strange Little Girl\09-I Don't Like Mondays.mp3
audio\Rap-Hip-Hop\Kirk Franklin & Nu Nation\God's Property\10 So Good.mp3
audio\tmoody-xp\Rock, Blues\Jeff Buckley - Last Goodbye.mp3
audio\Hard Rock\Box Car Racer\Box Car Racer\09-Sorrow.mp3
audio\Pop\Jem\Finally Woken\05-24.mp3
audio\Rap-Hip-Hop\Kelis\Tasty\Trick Me.mp3
audio\Hard Rock\The Best Heavy Metal Album\CD2\11 - Motorhead & Girlschool - Please Don't Touch.mp3
audio\Rap-Hip-Hop\Rahzel, The Godfather of Noyze\Make the Music 2000\01 The Human Beatbox (Interlude).mp3
audio\Rap-Hip-Hop\Tonight\Daddy Yankee ft Pitbull - Gasolina (Remix).mp3
audio\Soundtracks\Command & Conquer\15-Target.mp3
audio\Hard Rock\Sum 41\All Killer No Filler\03-Never Wake Up.mp3
audio\Pop\Alanis Morissette\Supposed Former Infatuation Junkie\05-Sympathetic Character.mp3
audio\Other\FF8\15 Shuffle Or Boogie.mp3
audio\Hard Rock\Foo Fighters\One By One\02-Low.mp3
audio\Jazz\Benny Goodman\Greatest Hits\12-Tea For Two.mp3
audio\Pop\Norah Jones\Feels Like Home\01-Sunrise.mp3
audio\Hard Rock\Limp Bizkit\Chocolate Starfish And The Hot Dog Flavored Water\08-The One.mp3
audio\Classical\Vivaldi - The Four Seasons\06-Summer, III. Presto (2m52s).ogg
audio\Hard Rock\MTV - The Return Of The Rock\19-Dope _ Everything Sucks (Andy Wallace Remix).mp3
audio\Other Rock\Tori Amos\Strange Little Girl\12-Real Men.mp3
audio\Soundtracks\Kingdom Hearts Soundtrack\31-Squirming Evil.mp3
audio\Hard Rock\Fear Factory\Obsolete [Collector's Edition Bonus Tracks]\13 Soulwound [-].mp3
audio\Pop\Shakira\Laundry Service\04-Rules.mp3
audio\Other Rock\Soul Coughing\Lust in Phaze\06-Blueeyed Devil.mp3

wow

*click the word "wow" above, it's a link*

Ok. I could see doing this flash to test some physics ideas or something. But a couple things strike me as weird about it.

A:) why is the figure falling through bubbles?
and most importantly B:) Why is the figure a woman in a black string bikini?

Anyways, I'm fascinated by this. If you click and hold your left mouse button, you can throw the figure around if "she" gets stuck.

I LOVE MY JOB

I had a nice, relaxing, enjoyable three-day weekend, and I come back to this place and it only takes 4 hours for me to become unmotivated again.

The Big Date

So, it's monday night already. Where did the weekend go? Just seems like this morning I was writing a big post about it being saturday and now poof, it's monday night already.

Anyways, I'm tardy in writing about The Big Date saturday night (I don't date that much, hence the capitilization). The Big Date went about as good as I could've planned it. Dinner was great, we talked about alot of things. We have to go back again in order to get the calamari, though (Long story). After dinner at the Olive Garden, we got in my car and drove over to Legacy Village whilst listening to Gavin DeGraw (good CD, highly recommend the Stripped re-release). Once we got to Legacy Village we strolled through the streets, checked out a few shops, scoffed at the high priced items. There's a little "park" or grassy area in the middle of the village, and they had a stage setup, and a trio was playing some classic soft rock hits, some stuff from Simon and Garfunkel, etc. We found a little patio table outside the Haagen Dazs store, and proceeded to just relax, eat an ice cream cone (with a minor incident), and people watch. Like the woman who was really, REALLY having a good time with her ice cream cone, or the girl who sounded either like she was choking or was a mentally challenged person with turet's (turns out she was just laughing). We listened to the music for a while, then strolled back along the village, got back in the car and went back to the olive garden where we parted ways and both agreed that we needed to this again very soon.

So, the good vibe I'd gotten from chatting/talking on the phone with Tammy so far has translated to face-to-face, which is rare for me. But I don't think either of us has any expectations on where things will/may go. We'll just take things day by day and see where life decides to lead us. Best case, we were meant for each other. Worst case, we'll always have Legacy Village, Simon and Garfunkel and Haagen Dazs ice cream ;-)

For now, I'm relaxing, watching some fireworks on tv, and reading a good book (Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson). Trying not to think about rollout week at work and having to get the RamQuest project finished by friday. ah well, that's tomorrow concerns, not tonights.

stupid treo

I had this big post all ready to submit, but the javascript on the page screwed up on the treo somehow. anyways, this is the saturday post for now.

TGIT

so, yeah. it's thursday night. one day left in the week. Unfortunately that day is the day of the apocalypse. Never really pegged the apocalypse to fall on a friday. Monday was a dead giveaway as being an apocalyptic day. I could even see Sunday. But Friday? never saw that coming. Combing through the post-apocalyptic ashes next week should prove to be an experience.

Anyways, at least I have the long weekend to look forward to and my date. Should be a good time. Getting a pretty good vibe with Tammy so far, but won't jinx it by predicting if things will go well or not saturday night. We're going to Olive Garden for dinner, and then walking around Legacy Village afterwards, for those nosy (that's namely for you, Jen).

Just realized I've had the PimpBerry2 for a week now, feels like I just got it yesterday. Ahh, sweet sweet, PimpBerry2. Where praytell have you been all my life?? Now to just use it more than surfing the web over lunch and sending emails back and forth to The Doors. Oh well, a wise man once told me "Sometimes you gotta live a little".

ARRRHHH MATEY

It's a dog's life

Somedays I wish I was a dog. Dog's usually have very few responsibilities. Sure some dogs guard things, others sniff for drugs, some race professionally. But for the most part, dogs don't have much to do. Get up, eat, check out the house, make sure all your toys are there, go back to sleep, rinse, lather, repeat. Sure being a dog's not all that great, you're screwed if your owner forgets to walk or feed you. But if you can get in a good home, life's pretty good as a dog.